NEARNESS OF YOU

Dressed in black and blue

wearing a mischievous smile

 

Walking as if you own the world

and smiling as if it’s been a while

 

You come… and serenade the mundane

blow by blow

I ask, where did I let myself go…

Where did I lose focus in time?

The endeavor or the grace,

where did I fall out of my fast pace

and slowly started to live back time...

The moment you start

is the moment I became benign

I know little is known of you

to those standing in line

And I may too end up
waiting in time
but I'll take every chance
that gets me to you

One day at a time
I think we can make it through
till you become me
or I you...

And what would I not give if I could find...

what you hide in silence

Are those the words that will set me free?

But all that you look for

and all that you do

is what makes you true

I try and hide, keep a level head

and grow far out of sight,

keep calm and while away time

 

Because when you walk away,

each time it causes deep pain

It’s a feeling I’ve not known
and I know somehow I won't again

But it comes to me and remains

with long after I’ve mulled

all that there was to

In silence and at midnight

I am used to being my own cynosure

you’ve come and displaced
that rapture, jolted the core..

Everything there was, I was

after and before...

And I thought I was complete

before you came and chipped me away

and in the most populous of places

I feel more barren than I was yesterday

And yet I long to wait in each line

knowing not what lies ahead..

 

Could it be a mirage that lulled me in time...

Hoping you'd have me

somewhere in your heart if not mind...

Could I ever call you mine…?

I know I must be losing it

cause somehow I take everything you give me

as a final part of this tale

It kills me to know we’re not conjoined at heart...

we never were and it may stay so; we grow apart

 

But growing old together is my wistful mind at play

And gnawing at its doorstep is a hope

that this winter will turn

into a romantic autumn someday

And the hope wakes me up each day too

I could die each night

if all my mornings were to begin with you

And all that you leave behind is something

I could never earn...

And what could I say to you but go on…

I’m lying in hope,

only hoping that it brings some respite

I know odds overwhelm me

like nothing else in the world
and its them against my might

And yet I dare to ask you each time
you are the one for me and there's nothing
that will close that thought in time

It’s the audacity of hope that makes me inane

to bleed out any shame, discomfort or pain
and look beyond that dysfunctional logics
that obfuscate the pain

And seek you till you’re far away from my sight

and might... (which I know you never will be)

and nestled in oblivion…

And if curtains fall on this sight

I’ll not be putting up any fight…

I'm in love and always will be...

Somewhere, happy I’ll be dreaming,

gazing down your deep magical eyes

relinquishing alone in my heaven…

of togetherness that would only renew

  A vision that remained

while you leapt towards skies…