Medicine

There are but few cures
to seal the pain

love procures

the seething pain

that drives you insane
no sleep or hunger

nothing but the trigger-happy feeling

of remaining bound by its refrains

they say it can easily kill you

and I say you are but a patient at best

if you were to remain

hoping and knowing

not asking or showing

patterns are nowhere

no maps or guides

bring out the torch, light the candles

oh the mysteries of this love,

they can keep you up
from daybreak to twilight

bound by surprises

hidden like treasured prizes
growing and gnawing
even if from a distance

you cannot fully know its gaze

its shines within your

and can light up your darkest days

a medicine that works

when none other can  

love is a potion

that's dwindling even in proportions 

try and go through

all the open doors
or look through the underground
all the way up to the core

if love is a pill
then I'm in love with medicine
and the doctor who came
up with this cure

for what love stands for
any lifetime is obscure...

one way emotion

its easy to see 

why love is a strong emotion

easier still when it's about you

something, I can do with all my devotion

Put me behind bars

and tie me with all possible restraints,

and yet I will be freefalling,

whether in our ruins or remains

I have a few reasons to smile,

but none strong enough to stop this flow

now that you're leaving,

this blood is all but snow

wish there was more from where this came,

wish you were sure of me as I am of you ,

wish I could turn back time and ask you

to keep me from falling apart,

before you asked me not to...

but now that everything is said and done,

the few vows rendered obsolete

and veils left forlorn

standing in a quiet corner of my heart

I can perhaps tell this silence

how much I wanted to love you

and maybe you can tell me

you would have liked some of it..

In this quiet absence,

there is but little obvious pain

the insanity is such

that everyone will continue living sane

those mortal will die

and those dead will remain buried

and between the two

i will sit and ponder

of the almost breaths you gave me..

करवट 

रहा न मैं फिर अपने जैसा

 जो चला आया तेरा अक्स 

खुले एक दरवाज़े से

तेरा नाम में लिपटा हुआ 

एक साया

टूटी मेरी तन्हाई से

मीलों की दूरियां

सादियों के फासले

नापता सिर्फ तेरे क़दमों 

की गूंजती आहटों से

 तुमने कहा था 
सपने तो अपने हैं
अब नीदें ही रवां है तो 
बस करवट तुम तक लाती है 

बंद आँखे धोखा देती हैं कभी 
कभी खुली आँखें पानी बन जाती हैं

दोनों के बीच
एक करवट बन आओ तुम 
सपने से खींच
हक़ूीक़त बन आओ अब तुम 

Liar Liar

I set you free
from my mistakes and insanity

and there you will be

perfect in your serendipities

'cause there is one chance

that you I know you will not take

and that is to bet

on this bundle of mistakes...

I know you said you forgive me,

but was there any truth

speaking through you

or just misery tired of my lies?

I did ask you to cry in my arms

when I did become

the reason for your tears,

adding salt to the wounds

that I had fought

to separate all these years

Between you and me, 

we've weathered all storms

but perhaps none bigger

than these past few wrongs...

I know I cannot undo what I have done

and I know with every sad moment

that turns into regret

that I can't forgive myself
and you can't forget...

And if this is how it ends then 

forever suspended I will feel wry

and like a open wound

always think of 'why' 

I did lie to myself much more

is all I know

when I told myself
that I know who I am

and told you that 
I am sure...

FORGET

There are often moments in life

that we all long to forget

regret or otherwise

moments, we all relive

rather in disdain,
all in our head

We came across each other

at that certain time

you looking for hope

And me, just someone I could call mine

With friendship,
the bond grew

we began seeing things

no one else around knew

Days, weeks and months just melted

even from afar

As the distance blended into

our sacred, lovely moments' jar

One by one, we managed to untangle

the knots, 

and sort the anomalies that had earlier

shredded our hearts

Then love followed taking it to a level new

when I first felt your skin on mine

you felt our souls intertwined

It was all but a fairy tale, because this was true

slowly I was believing in love again

'cause I was being myself
and I was still being loved by you..

Time then borrowed wings,

hurried along before spreading the span

flew us into our quarters but not apart

longing gnawing a bittersweet pain

only to melt with a moment spent together

And one day when that moment finally came

our joy knew no bounds

We held hands and kissed too

and didn't know when to stop

Till boundaries seemed meaningless

and love flowed from the heart

All the long distance of longing

finally came to fore to soothe two raging hearts

Just short of a fairy tale

then followed a moment that made you wail

my inability to share things,

especially the ones that mattered most

almost sealed our fate

A fatal, forgetful sin

one I never dreamt of

even in my wildest dreams..

It began to bleed and the pain was too real

the tears in your eyes said much more

than the words you said or the ones I feared

all the time looking for things that could heal

but there was nothing to be found

You were my saviour,
my balm, my winning ground

And by creating a void in your happiness

I lost my baritone, a soundless explosion

that made hollow my throne

and no longer were you there,

my wings were clipped too

And the walls of my heart were stripped bare

along the corridors of pain
I stumbled along wisdom
and then some more 
and with your lingering presence 
rooted it back to my core

even from a distance
the journey then seemed a little less uphill
my peaks were still growing
and you were climbing still
and with your hands in mine
we gaped at the sunset
dipped in a glowing haze
to forget the misery 
that once beget..

Mirage

In a silent spot on the crowded train
I scream out your name
only to hear your echo
in my ears

With eyes shut tight
And ears holding up might
to suck out the light

The nameless faces pause for a second
And then go back to their ordinary lives
And take with them
the mirage that you were here...

The silent solitude and the empty bliss
together usurp any remnants of restraint
to let me see you with closed eyes
or envision with eyes open that you're here 

Opium indifference

with a slit of light

the cloud puff became clear

the inching of your breath

and the lisps in your swears

the sky had descended

replacing the blue with black

the scraped skin in your fingers

and the midnight in your backpack

cuddled in the ruins of your coiled hair

were the restrains of the night

that we had previously laid bare

the dark spots on the walls

had witnessed with sleepy blur

the opium on your tongue

and the quiet soothing of pain

the vibrations had softened to slow

as indifference began to grow

in the shell of slumberous lair

I finally felt the spring in my chair

a few feet higher than ground

my feet nowhere to be found

like feathers suspended in mid-air

a new breed had mushroomed within

taller than my wares

I was indifferent to prying glares...

I was free at last,

but the price was too much to pay

living in the night

thinking of it to be day..

Restraint

We both expect

but neither can relent

we both object

but neither can refrain sans the resent

made from our heart's mind

and bound by its make

we pursue our destinations

farther as they gallop in opposing directions

many seasons came and went

ample thoughts to lure the mind's vent

if only logics drove love

no  misery would befall this world

stuck like glue, I am meant to be with you

and you be with your dreams for now

and there someday I will reach

within the confined of our restraint

far as it seems as of now,

decimated as I look up to the sky

and you look down upon our remains

the only journey upward remains

maybe its a crazed belief

my heart's keeper, it is you that I seek

and without you, there really isn't any sight

let alone the differences between day and night

in innocent chambers of heart they dwell

for the feelings we left behind did swell

and compounded into desires bigger than our pain

how long can we live in this restraint?