Guilty ..



I testify
I made a mistake
I cant run
I have no space to hide
I wish I could lie
I wish the
walls would open up ..
And I wouldn't
have to sulk every night
I must rectify
But
Where to begin from
and
Who all to pacify ..
The whole world
seems to be
cornering me
with questioning eyes
A mistake is one
In which intentions
don't dwindle
Just the worldly ways are
belied ..
It happened
one night
Too dark too see now
Too bright to dignify
What becomes of a disgrace ?
Is a shade more cursed than
A black spot ..
This fear will perhaps
pass death by ..
Why .. what no one can understand..
Is yet what matters,
Why cannot something else suffice ?
I see an image
of mine
painted black
In a colorful world
I close my eyes
It just doesn't pass me by ..
I see truth lingering
On my lips
I see lies smiling
At me wry ..
Matters that
We have no control over ..
Are also the ones we cant deny
In matters of heart
I wish the mind could
walk me by ..
Guilt ridden
In my bed
waiting for
an answer
As questions
pile up on my soul ..
and enlarge this void
I muster up for resurgence
As I prepare to let go ..
I have feared enough the
consequences
I must now do ..
I have nothing to lose
Nothing more to hide ..

All the thoughts
I think
and
All that
I choose
not to speak
Are the ones
that keep
me up
and thinking all night ..